Accidental Kidnapping
by WritingLoser
Summary: Dan takes too long to get ready to go to the radio station and Phil leaves him behind in the flat. Dan gets off the tube he finds himself in an awkward situation. It might have to do with the fact that he has a baby now. Or maybe because it's humid?
1. Chapter 1

Dan shifted awkwardly in his seat, leaning towards the window trying to block out all the yelling. He was riding in the tube and two women thought it was the perfect time shout each other across the vehicle. Even worse one of them had a baby in her arms and she was throwing foul language at the other woman.

No one else was saying anything but the two women, he dared to glance at the bystanders to see a few recording the scene. He silently cursed at himself for not leaving with Phil, he knew he should've gotten up earlier but _nooo_. He thought Phil was joking that he would leave him behind, gosh was he wrong.

* * *

"Daaaan let's go!" Phil whined clutching onto the doorknob, "We're going to be late!"

"We have plenty of time Phil!" Dan reasoned pulling out his phone and walking out where Phil could see him. He heard a gasp and Dan quickly looked up, "What's wrong?"

"You're still wearing your pyjamas?!" he exclaimed.

"What's wrong with it?"

Phil huffed and crossed his arms, "Dan, I'm going to leave you if you don't get ready in THREE SECONDS!"

Dan fanned him away and continued to walk upstairs, "Sure sure~!" he sang.

"I mean it!"

"Riiiiiiight!"

"One!"

"I'm still walking!"

Phil unlocked the door and opened it.

"Two!"

"I'm getting further into the flat~!

Phil let out an exasperated sigh and walked out the door, shutting it closed behind him. Dan paused from a moment. Did he just hear Phil walk out of the flat? Dan waited for a moment to see if Phil will call him again. When he didn't Dan spun around on his heel and quickly walked towards the door.

He poked his head out to and looked at the bottom of the staircase to see the door firmly closed. He hesitantly walked down and opened it. He poked his head out of the doorway and looked right to left and couldn't see Phil.

Dan pulled his head back into the flat, confusion written over his face. He reached for his phone as he closed the door then quickly texted Phil.

_Did you actually leave me?!_

_I told you I would ;)_

"SHIT!" Dan screamed and bolted up to his room to get changed.

* * *

The train went in a swift stop and the doors opened. He silently thanked god that he chose to sit in the very front where the exit was there and not having him to walk across the whole crowd. He got up and scurried out of the tube wanting to be far away as possible from the two screaming women.

He passed through the exit then heard gasps, shouts and swearing erupt from behind him. He spun around to see a small body flying his way. His eyes widen and instantly reached out and caught the figure. He slowly looked down in his arms to see a small baby looking up at him. She had glassy eyes and her bottom lip was quivering. It was enough to break a grown man's heart break.

More shouts erupted in front of him, he automatically pulled the baby close to his chest. The two women were having a full on brawl in the tube.

People were desperately trying to get away from the fight. A few trying to stop it and more even more looking in Dan's direction looking horrified.

A stifle cry came from the baby. Dan looked down and moved the baby girl to see her face properly. Tears were beginning to stream down her dark skin. Another whimper escaped from her lips.

His father instincts kicked in and immediately tried to calm the poor child down before she started to scream. He rocked her in his arms a few times trying to soothe her even more.

"Shhh shh it's going to be okay!" Dan silently sang to the small child. She smiled up at him and grazed his cheek with the tips of her fingers. She sniffed and Dan heard the snot run up her nose.

"Ewww!" he playfully teased her. She giggled loudly and repeated it. He chuckled softly at her actions. He then felt a gust of wind flow through his brown locks.

He looked up to see the train was gone.

* * *

Dan nearly fainted. Thankfully he didn't after all he did have a child in his arms.

He didn't know what to do, he didn't know the next stop, he didn't know the mom, he didn't know if she would even bother to come back, he wasn't to sure if he even wanted to give her back after seeing that she willingly threw the child at him.

A complete stranger to her.

He looked down at the baby once more to see that the child was slowly starting to warm up to him, which wasn't really new. Babies tend to warm up to Dan quickly.

She giggled at him happily reaching out towards him as if saying to pull her closer. He did what he was told and she softly pat under his eye. She laughed.

He couldn't help but smile at the young child. He made a decision and walked towards the BBC studio, clutching to the baby.

* * *

Dan ran into the the studio where Phil was preparing for the show.

"PHIL!" he called. The dark haired boy turned around to see his friend run in with a small baby.

"Uh Dan?" Phil started his eyes darting to his friend and the baby in his arms, "Did you get a girl pregnant and give birth under the amount of time I left you? Or...?"

Dan smiled sheepishly, "Um," he gulped, "this is Lola!" he laughed awkwardly as he gestured towards the small bundle of life.

Phil let out a heavy sigh, "Dan return her to her mother right now,"

"But I can't!" the brunet exclaimed, "Her mother was fighting another woman on the tube and she decided to _throw_ her child at me and I was already _out_ of the tube. Then she started to cry and I made feel better then when I looked back up, **bam**! The train is gone,"

"Oh my god!" Phil gasped covering his mouth in shock, "That's horrible! Who would do such a thing?!"

"I know right!"

Phil paused for a moment and stared at the small girl who stared at him happily.

"We still have to find her father you know,"

"I know I know but can we just wait a bit..." Dan replied quietly. Phil chewed on his bottom lip analyzing the situation. They were almost on air and they can't just have a child randomly be on air.

"Dan," Phil sighed.

"Oh pUH-LEEEAAASEEE Phil?!" the younger man begged, "She's already so used to me and I think she might be scared if we just hand her to new faces!"

"_We're_ new faces!" Phil pointed out.

"Yeah but I look like Winnie the Pooh so my face is somewhat familiar!" Dan exclaimed unable to keep the small smile off his face.

Phil started to chew on his thumb trying to come up with an idea before everyone saw them with a kid. Oh god if the shippers saw them...

"Fine!" Phil gave in unable to come up with an idea.

"Yes! Thank you Philly!" the brunet exclaimed. The older man's face burnt with embarrassment and cringed inwardly.

"Daaaaan,"

"Sorry sorry," he giggled, "_Phil_!" he corrected himself. Phil sighed heavily but Dan knew he wasn't serious since he could make out the small smile that had spread across his lips.

"Come on we're going to be on air soon," Phil muttered.

Dan grinned but before he could hand the baby to someone else they were already on air.

"Shit," they both mummer.

* * *

After stopping a shit storm that was likely to happen they explained everything. Although almost everyone stood by the fact that Lola was their secret child (even if they did joke about it).

After being on air for a bit they started to do a Dan VS Phil where they handed the Lola to one of the producers so they could complete the challenge.

Dan started to pull out a block carefully and safely put it back on the top. He suddenly felt tension raise from his chest. Phil did the same and they both repeated it until one of them failed.

"Lola!" the producer exclaimed dropping a few sheets of paper during the process.

The brunet looked up to see baby crawling towards him looking like she was about to cry. Dan gasped and quickly went to her aid knocking over the Jenga tower in the process.

"Hey!" Phil gasped moving backwards to avoid the blocks falling from the air.

"What's wrong Lola?" Dan cooed picked her up and placing her on his lap. She held onto Dan's dark shirt as she looked up at him with tears peeking out of her eyes. Her nose was red and she looked like she might burst into tears any moment.

"Did you think I left you?" he asked her, not really expecting a response considering she was about 12 months. To his surprise she nodded and hugged him softly. He hugged back full heartily.

"Oooooh," he cooed stroking her back, "I'm here don't worry," Phil cleared his throat gaining his attention.

Phil crossed his arms and had a small pout.

"Oh, I know!" Dan suddenly exclaimed. He pulled away from the hug and turned Lola around so she was facing Phil, "Why don't you two play peek a boo?"

"Already ahead of you!" Phil commented. He covered his eyes, "Where are you?" he sang.

"Where's Lola?" he grinned widely, he gasped and moved his hands out of his eyes, "Peek-a-boo!"

She giggled loudly making the duo smile widely. They continued their game of peek-a-boo until they had to go back and continue the radio show.

Lola never left Dan's side again for the rest of the radio show.


	2. Chapter 2

**I was all over the place when I posted this. It was the morning when I realized I have created a new story. So...yeah...this is happening...**

Dan peeked out the window of the radio station to see his ecstatic fans cheering for them. He pulled Lola closer to his chest holding her head softly yet firmly. Lola squirmed to see what was happening outside. She tilted her head in confusion but broke out into a small smile and pointed outside.

She made happy noises and looked back at Dan.

Dan looked at her with an amused grin, "Yeah it looks great, that's until you get out there and you hear their screaming and believe me when I tell you, it is loooud!" he chuckled. She gave him a toothless smile. His heart just melted.

"Dan?"

Dan jumped a bit before turning to see his best friend Phil. He looked at him questioningly before asking, "Did you ask if we could use the back entrance?"

Phil nodded, "Yeah, they said it was alright," His eyes drifted outside the window. He felt a sharp pang in his heart, oh gosh he felt so guilty. He knew they all wanted to meet them and now meet Lola.

Dan followed his gaze then huffed, "I mean we told them not to come and if they did leave! We know Lola is going to be freaked out," he reasoned with his friend.

Phil sighed, "Yeah I know. She's shaking in her boots right now," They both looked at her.

Lola was attempting to move away from Dan's grip and get a better look outside. She laughed then made noises of excitement.

Phil chuckled. Dan frowned, "We're still go to the back entrance,"

Phil rolled his eyes in an amused way before saying to Lola, "Come on let's go to the police station," he cooed. They both started walking to the back exit with Lola still in Dan's arms.

Dan frowned with realization he was going to have to give Lola back to her father. Before he can feel too much self-pity, his brain had registered what Phil had said.

"Wait, what?"

"What do you mean what?" Phil asked a bit confused by Dan's words.

"'Oh come on, Lola let's go to the police station!' Because that certainly doesn't freak out anyone!" Dan exaggerated.

The older youtuber laughed, "I mean, what else do you want to say?"

"Anything other than that!"

By that point they were both outside and a thought hit Phil.

"Wait, how'd you know her name was Lola?" he asked. It might be a stupid question but he had a feeling it wasn't.

Dan froze.

He. Fucking. Knew. It.

"Dan!" Phil stopped walking and stood a bit in front of his friend, "Did you name her?!"

"Look! I didn't know what else to call her other than a 'small child forced onto me' and frankly that didn't sound to pleasant!" Dan stumbled across his words.

"So you gave her name?! Dan!" Phil exasperated, he covered his eyes with his hands.

"I'm sooorry!"

"Dan, you know once you start naming things you start getting attached!" Phil empathised.

Dan frowned and held Lola closer to him who looked at them with confusion.

"You know we're going to give her to her father and never see her again, right?!" Phil questioned, leaning in closer with a hard gaze.

Dan went quiet.

Phil stared at him until his eyes widen with realisation, "Oh no...you didn't actually think..." He pulled away from his friend.

His younger friend flushed darkly with embarrassment and refused to met his older friend's gaze. Phil facepalmed.

"Oh Dan!"

"I'm sorry okay! It's not like I actually thought of raising her with you! It's just that the thought of giving her back with her family never fully crossed my mind!" He awkwardly explained.

Phil tried to keep calm, he can't be too mad at him. He just can't. They both have to work together with this.

"Look...let's just go to the police department and see what happenes from there on," Phil decided, awkwardly placing a hand on Dan's shoulder.

Dan squeezed his lips tightly and stiffly nodded. Then they both continued walking to the police station.

* * *

Once they reached the police station they both immedaitely knew that this was extremely old and help may come a little longer than expected. (**A/N: Yeah, I'm American and tried looking into how english police stations are like to see if they are any different than American ones. The only thing I learned was that there's a blue thing hanging outside the building and english policemen were called, 'bobbies'. You English people are weird.**)

The place was run down than most, it looked like something back in the 70s. The walls were a bit cracked and all that shiz. Dan and Phil exchanged doubtful glances.

"Should we just go to a different one?" Dan asked.

Phil frowned, "No, I mean it's got to be somewhat good or this place would've been shut down,"

Dan winced at Phil's logic but decided not to question it. They made their way up to the counter or policeness. The lady behind it was typing away on an old computer, her eyes were dead and fixed on the screen. Her clothes were obviously tight and her fat was just barely holding behind the collar. Her cheeks seemed to be melting off her face and just barely clinging on.

Dan and Phil exchanged glances before turning back to the woman. Phil gripped onto his shirt collar and cleared his throat to get her attention.

Her eyes blinked slowly and he SWORE he saw a bit of eye dust fly off. She slowly turned to the duo. She stared at them for a while before in a drone voice asked, "What?"

Phil hesitated for a moment before continuing, "Uh we would like to report a found baby,"

She stared at him for a moment before taking a deep breath...a very deep breath.

Dan slowly looked at Phil with a exasperated expression. Phil only offered a shrug as a response. Dan huffed which caused Lola to look at him with a amusing experssion.

The pudgy woman finally stopped breathing in...and then soon began letting it out.

Phil cringed. Maybe they should have gone to a different place. His eyes slowly looked to the right where Dan was standing.

His younger friend was scowling at him that can only say, "I fucking told you so,".

Phil cowered and smiled at him sheepishly.

The lady finally finished with a final puff. There was another moment of silence before she reached for the clipboard and a pen beside her.

"Okay, can you tell me what happened?" she asked in an uninterested tone with uninterested eyes.

Phil looks at Dan, however he looked reluctant to say anything until he gently nudged him for encouragement.

"Well you see," Dan began, "I was on the tube heading to BBC and two women were arguing with one another from across the tube. One of them had a child in her lap then the tube stopped, I got off, then I just heard these screams and gasps. So I turned around to see an object flying towards me and I am not very good at catching things.

I kinda just cower away or push away from me because I'm always thinking 'it's a bomb! Why would you catch it?' but something...just told me to catch it! I know it's a bit odd, I usually don't get these kind of thin-"

Phil nudged him and gave him an annoyed looked. His eyes flickered to the lady who continued to bore her eyes into them. He looked back at down hoping that he got the message.

He did. Dan weakly smiled then continued, "...Anyways! I caught the object and it turned out it was Lola!" He bounced his arms and made Lola giggle, he chuckled then looked back at the woman continued once more, "She was about to cry and I made her laugh but once I made her feel better again. I looked up and the train was gone!"

The woman stared at him, long and hard, "So..." She lifted the pen and clipboard to her face, "What time of day was this? And why it'd take so long to come her?"

Phil piped up, "It around 7 o' clock and we had a radio show at BBC so we had to do that first," He was about to continue but the lady interrupted.

"Wait!" she exclaimed with energy for the first time. They both froze and awkwardly waited for her to continue, "...You guys work for BBC? And host a radio show?"

Dan felt a sinking feeling in his stomach, oh gosh did she know who they were?!

Phil answered uneasily, "Yes..."

"So they makes you guys...famous? Right?" she asked slowly, as if she herself was trying to put the pieces together.

"Um...I'm not sure?" Phil replied feeling rather uncomfortable with the subject.

Before she could continue to interrogate them, Dan hastily interrupted, "How does this have to do with Lola?"

"It doesn't," she answered in a monotone voice.

Phil shifted eyes to Dan and the lady whom he never caught the name of, "Well can we...er-" he quickly glanced at her name tag 'Cheryl', "-Cheryl?" he asked as politely as he could.

It took her a moment before finally continuing, "Fiiiiine," she dragged.

"Okay so after that we basically came here,"

"Uh huh," she hummed, straightening her back a bit and sneaking some perfume on. She fluffed her thin hair a bit.

This would've been fine if she was doing this beforehand and not after she was questioning if she was famous or not.

She put mints in her mouth and cleared her throat a bit. Started straightening her clothes out, putting a bit of blush on her lifeless skin.

It was all very...weird.

"Well boys," she tried her hardest to sound seductive but come out as a straining walrus, they both inwardly cringed, "We can put her in foster care if you want her off your paws,"

Lola looked at her, confused and gripped onto Dan's shirt. She tugged on it a few times until he looked down at her. She gave puppy dog eyes as if asking what was happening.

Fear, was obviously in her eyes.

"Uhh...no!" Dan suddenly blurted, tearing his eyes away from Lola. _Crap. What did I do?_

Phil and Cheryl looked at him with confusion, "No?" They both asked in an unison only Cheryl was more shocked and Phil's was more questioning.

Cheryl giggled as cutely as she could but only sounded like a pig oinking, "Look at us, saying the same thing at the same time. It's almost as if-" her eyes widen and leaned over the counter, "-soulmates!" she whispered for only Phil's ears but Dan managed to hear as well.

It made them both to resist to leaving right then and there. They had limits and they weren't sure if Lola wasn't here they would have left by now.

Phil laughed uneasily and backed away from the counter subtly, "That's nice," he squeaked, nervously.

"So you agree!?" she gasped her eyes filling with joy for the first time. Dan almost felt sorry for her.

Phil gave Dan a quick subtle 'jESUS CHRIST WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO HELP ME OUT HERE?!'. Thankfully, Dan caught it.

"Do you think you can find her father?" Dan questioned.

Cheryl looked at him with an annoyed gaze, she flopped back into her seat, "Well, if we were to do that it'll take at least a week," she turned to her computer back to the position where she was when they first came in.

"And if the foster home is out of the question and she has no relatives near by that leaves us with one choice," she turned to them, "Do you two think you can take care of her for a week?"

Dan and Phil were startled by the question, they knew it was coming but that didn't stop them from being shocked.

"Of course, a full background check will be insused, immediately," she droned, she slowly reached for the phone and brought it up to her ear. She punched a few buttons before droning, "Mr. Jones? We have two fine gentlemen up here who need a full background check." She paused, "So they can take care of a baby...black, around a year and her name is..." She looked at the duo.

"Uhh Lola," Dan answered.

"Right, Lola," she answered into the phone. Here was another pause, "Two gentlemen around their twenties, white, tall and not to mention sexy," she winked at Phil, who was blushing with embarrassment and cowered away from her, "Yeah, yeah whatever...okay,"

She hung up and turned to the duo.

"Go to the right hallway, take on turn to the right and the second door to the left," she explained and stared them down until they awkwardly shuffled down the left hallway.

"The other way," she corrected annoyed.

Dan and Phil both mummered apologises and quickly went across the counter again to the right. Feeling embarrassed throughout the whole way to the door that said 'Mr. Jones'.

**Sorry it took so long to post but shit happens.**


End file.
